“We were standing together in the church, and my boyfriend suddenly embraced and kissed me on the cheek. A lady standing nearby immediately murmured out quite loudly: “You’d better be more restrained!” Is this really serious misconduct? What kind of emotions are out of place in church?”
The Church is the house of God. If we were to visit someone for an event such as a meeting with the city mayor, we would direct all our attention to him. If friends of mine who are in a relationship came to my place and started to show their affection for each other while I am sitting there ready to talk with them, what does that look like?
If you are meeting me, then be polite and pay attention to me since you came by yourself and I didn’t make you come by force. This is the same with church. One should understand that, when we go to church, we do it to stay in the presence of God. We can come together as a couple, as friends, as a family which is good. We should do that, but we go to God for it is God that we should pay attention to. Therefore, I think that such situations do not seem to be really appropriate.
On the other hand, unfortunately, in our churches, there are still many so-called «inspectors», who come to watch others and see how people cross themselves, where they kneel down, etc. I wouldn’t like this to sound too deprecating, but, very often, their attention is directed not on the one they came to but on someone else. They are people who almost consider their only mission to be paying attention to what others do wrong, and this is a very harmful thing.
Ten years ago, we conducted a big sociological youth survey. Speaking with young people, we found out that most of them, especially in the east of our country, stopped their attempts to go to the church because of encountering such «inspectors».
I think that one should indicate if something is wrong but in a very benevolent way. One should add something pleasant: “It’s good that you came here, but perhaps you could reserve your affection for more private circumstances since, in church, they are not relevant.” In no way, however, should something be said without ceremony.
Responded to by Fr. Rostyslav Pendiuk, Head of the UGCC Youth Commission, minister of the Transfiguration Church in Lviv.
Recorded by Tetiana Trachuk
Photo: luxury
